This week I have been preparing for my friend’s funeral. I have been blessed with the honour of speaking at the wake and have been preparing my speech. Richy Pitch was a good friend of mine who had helped me through many a time, including with my alcoholism. He always had logical and supportive advice for me and was great at showing me alternative viewpoints. It’s so great to have a friend like that who can find you solutions that you have never considered. I miss him and think of him often. I still can’t believe that he has passed away, it seems dream like, as if I’ll wake up from this bizarre episode and see and hear his voice again. He was many things to me, an icon, a hero, a cult figure, pioneer, DJ, teacher and above all, loving friend.

I hope that I can be as good to my friends as Richy was to me, and everyone else he reached in his life. He was a gentle, thoughtful and compassionate man. One of the real ones.

So this week I am reflecting quite heavily on my speech for Richy. I’ve never spoken at a funeral before and I am nervous. It is however such an honor that Richy asked me to speak as one of his final requests. I’ve began to write about him and all the incredible things he achieved in his life. Even though his life has been tragically cut short, in his final days he himself told me how content he was at what he had done, from being a founding member of the famous ‘Scratch’ nights in Kings Cross to DJ’ing for The Gorillas, supporting De La Soul, working with countless Artists from around the world and not to mention writing the definitive music production book for Apple. It’s made me value life even more and thrust me forward again to consider my own life options, being productive, open, positive, healthy, clean and of course sober.

And so I have had a good week making music. I have really immersed myself deep into production since I’ve been back from holiday, the process makes me feel alive, but also heals me. Somehow it is cathartic and allows me to release my emotions, but also be able to hear them back, is like a mirror. The music I am making connects me better with myself, giving me a broader understanding of who I am. It brings me contentment and purpose. I strongly suggest that for anybody in recovery, they find time each day to practice an instrument, paint a picture, do some gardening or explore anything that you could like. It’s a great way to free yourself from ruminating amongst your thoughts, find your path, understand who you are and embrace the present. With this mindset I’m looking forward to each day and what it will bring.

With that in mind, there are some social events next week that I should go to. Firstly I have a renunion with two close friends and we’re going out for a drink at a pub. I wonder how that will go, because both of them are university buddies that I used to drink endlessly with. I’m still getting used to staying out with people getting drunk and I’m slowly getting better at it, but sitting around the table for endless hours drinking and talking will be one last hurdle for me. They are great friends of mine, so we have much in common. If I let myself go I’m sure real friendship will prevail and I will not succumb to temptation.

The second, is a big old house party in the countryside 50 to 100 people. Again, university friends, however this time I’m sure there’ll be obese drinking until eight in the morning, probably some class A’s to the soundtrack of house and jungle. This will be a real test for me. In no way do I think that I should be staying up till 8 in the morning without doing drugs, however I do hope that I can spend four or five hours there catching up with people, having a giggle and slide off home at two or three in the morning.